As there is so much debate and discussion around FORGIVENESS in the Australian media at the moment I thought I would share some of the insights I have come to.
Forgiveness is a feeling of freedom that you experience when you can come to an understanding and gain perspective.
Forgiveness is for you. Not for perpetrators, rather it is a process that is made up of several key factors that work together and you choose to go through to help you feel better about your life.
The path to forgiveness is something that you consciously decide to do for yourself.
Life is a gift we are given without expectation. It is what we decide to do with it each and everyday that determines how much we enjoy it.
All humans make mistakes, and there will always be people on this earth that will hurt others. They CHOOSE to do this. As you can choose to speak out or not, to tolerate it or not, to demand our laws change or not.
People that tend to harm others are usually being driven by one of these four belief categories:
1. Those that believe they are entitled (to do, be and have whatever they want).
2. Those that believe “It’s better to beg for forgiveness than to ask for permission”
3. Those that believe they don’t have to think about or be responsible for the consequences of their actions.
4. Those who believe that they are RIGHT in what ever they are doing based on their beliefs of religion, education, community or family norms.
We cannot fix or change people, we can only fix or change ourselves.
We can build better communities by being better at understanding one another, choosing compassion rather than judgement. Develop a willingness to think, listen, learn and contribute in a positive way.
If we want happiness, we have to work to get it. Every single one of us.
We get to CHOOSE what we do, what we say and when and how it is said.
We as a global community have a thinking problem.
We are too ready to “leave it to others” to solve the problems of the community.
We are too ready to criticize one another when a mistake is made.
We tolerate hate, racism, fear and anger because we see it being played out in our media every day.
We tolerate our politicians bickering with one another rather than focusing their efforts on community problem solving.
Change starts with you, yes you reading this, it starts with me and it starts with you. We are all responsible for our role in the world.
The one advantage you can give yourself today is perspective.
When you can begin to understand that others are acting from a set of values and beliefs that are different from yours then you (and the world) can begin to heal and move forward.
I had a choice five years ago when I walked into the hospital and saw my fathers beaten and broken body I could choose hate or love.
I chose love and a journey towards forgiveness because I don’t ever want to see another face like that again.
No matter who it belongs to.
I have seen too many broken families, too many sad, angry, frustrated and bitter people. I have seen and heard too many people say “leave it to others”. I will not be another one, I will work for change. I am not without mistakes, problems or frustrations. I own them and work on them. Not always willingly or easily, but I keep striving forward – I have no choice – I want better, better for everyone.
We all have a responsibility to choose better.
So I’m choosing to #SendForgivenessViral